WWE’s Money in the Bank pay-per-view took place this Sunday. Money in the Bank 2019 was an important PPV for the company. It is the first PPV after WrestleMania and it comes at a time when overall interest in the WWE product is at an all-time low. 

The build for the Money in the Bank pay-per-view has been all over the place this year. It really showed how weak the writing team is when it comes to crafting storylines for mid-card feuds, not to mention the Wild Card Rule which was Vince’s reactionary decision to falling ratings and television executive pressure. Still I approached the event with an open mind, because… I love professional wrestling. 

Usos def. Daniel Bryan and Rowan (c)

Daniel Bryan is on the kickoff show?! The Uso Penitentiary has turned into the Uso comedy hour now? These 4 are in a no-win situation. The Usos were built up to be legitimate bad asses after years of neon face paint and they’ve been turned into a bootleg episode of Swerved. Meanwhile, they’re expected to keep the RAW tag division afloat. Daniel Bryan and Rowan can’t look weak in defeat. They’re the SmackDown Tag Team Champions. These two teams are on different brands. Why are they facing each other? Wild Card Rule!

Jey Uso got worked over by Bryan and Rowan. Jimmy got the hot tag only to be smacked around by Rowan. Oh, and commercials…. for the PPV you’re currently watching. Both Usos got suplexed off the second rope by Rowan which was a nice spot. Jey went for the splash off the top rope to get caught into the LeBell Lock. Usos took out Rowan with double super kicks outside and pinned Bryan with a double splash.

Not a fan of this booking, but a decent match none the less. These four guys are top tier talents, but none of this makes sense.

WHAT ARE THE RULES?!

This win certainly puts The @WWEUsos in contention for the #SDLive #TagTeamTitles…

What a way to kick off #MITB! pic.twitter.com/rrlNa1eS7y

— WWE (@WWE) May 19, 2019

We get a SD tag title shot. #MITB

— The Usos (@WWEUsos) May 20, 2019

2 1/2 STARS

Women’s Money in the Bank Ladder Match

Naomi enters first dressed as Bumblebee (from DC Comics). The other contenders in this match were Carmella, Bayley, Mandy Rose, Nikki Cross, Natalia, Ember Moon and Dana Brooke.

All the women stand in a circle around the ring staring at the briefcase for way too long before they kick it off. Nikki Cross spun around with the ladder knocking every one down in the spot that got a chuckle out of me.

Carmella looked like she legitimately hurt her knee and Rose wouldn’t let up while Carmella told her “Get away!” ‘Mella was helped to the back by the WWE staff. I thought the injury was legit, but ‘Mella came running back out and took out Mandy. DeVille took out Carmella and carried Mandy up the ladder. Bayley ran up the ladder, smiled at the two, knocked them both down and grabbed the briefcase.

Bayley is your 2019 Ms. Money in the Bank!

Opportunity missed yet again with the women. Hate that there was outside interference yet again and while it didn’t determine the winner, it’s been done one too many times already.

3 Stars

Rey Mysterio def. Samoa Joe (c) – UNITED STATES CHAMPIONSHIP

Trash. Rey surprise pins Joe yet again and is your new United States Champion. Joe looks up angry and surprised… again. This match lasted 2 minutes. The post-match beatdown lasted longer. Dominic came down, watched Joe destroy Mysterio and did nothing.

1 Star

Shane McMahon def. The Miz

I honestly forgot what this feud was about. I watched the recap and didn’t care much. Shane’s missed coast-to-coast being caught by The Miz and put into the figure four was a nice spot. The ref stopping the count when Shane’s leg was on the rope was disappointing. That made no damn sense. WHAT ARE THE RULES?!

Shane drops to the floor outside the cage after a lengthy attempt by The Miz at a suplex off the cage. Shane slipped out of his shirt for the win.

End. This. Feud.

3 Stars

Tony Nese (c) def. Ariya Daivari – CRUISERWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP

I like both these guys. Nese is a beast and one hell of an athlete. I’ve been a Daivari fan since his Cruiserweight Classic debut. Good back and forth action. These two put on a good show despite some idiots in the crowd chanting “Boring!” Nese wins with the running knee in the corner.

https://twitter.com/eddiepotatoes/status/1130265535252508674?s=21

3 1/4 Stars

Becky Lynch (c) def. Lacey Evans – RAW WOMEN’S CHAMPIONSHIP

Lacey Evans comes out with a couple money guns. Becky comes out wearing the RAW Women’s Championship belt and raising the SmackDown Women’s Championship belt in the air.

This should have been a squash, but Vince likes himself some tall blondes. Becky retains following a sloppy exchange that lead to Lacey tapping out to the Disarm-Her.

2 1/2 Stars

Charlotte Flair def. Becky Lynch (c) – SMACKDOWN WOMEN’S CHAMPIONSHIP

Becky stood with her two belts celebrating her win over Lacey when Charlotte’s music hit.

These two have wrestled so much over the years. They always put on a show. That said, I’m tired of seeing Lynch as the babyface underdog. Kind of ready to see her be the badass her nickname dictates, The Man. Guess we’ll have to keep waiting. Evans came down, hit Lynch with Women’s Right, allowed Flair to take advantage and get the pin for the win.

Good match. Crap Finish.

3 Stars

Bayley def. Charlotte Flair (c) – SMACKDOWN WOMEN’S CHAMPIONSHIP

There was a post-match beatdown with Flair and Evans on Becky with Bayley running down for the save. Bayley bests Charlotte and decides to cash in the briefcase. Bayley hits the elbow from the top rope and pins Charlotte to win the SmackDown Women’s Championship.

NO RATING.

Roman Reigns def. Elias

Elias hit Reigns with the guitar backstage. He did his in-ring concert thing. Reigns came in afterwards, hit Elias with a Superman punch, spear and pin for the win.

Waste of time.

1 Star

Seth Rollins (c) def. AJ Styles – UNIVERSAL CHAMPIONSHIP

I want to see these two in a hair vs. hair match. Really good back and forth action between these two. We knew this had all the makings despite the lackluster build and these two guys are not great promos.

AJ’s selling was incredible. Seth’s frog splash was one of the best I’ve seen this year from anyone not named Montez Ford. There were some amazing near-falls that got me to bite hard several times. The Curb Stomp missed, Rollins caught and into the Styles Clash!!! 1, 2, KICK-OUT!!! Pretty unbelievable stuff.

Rollins hit AJ with the Ripcord Knee, super-kick and the stomp and went on to score the pin to retain.

Match of the night.

4 1/2 Stars

Lucha House Party vs. Lars Sullivan

This came out of nowhere. Guess this was Vince’s way of trying to build up Lars despite his recent fine and reprimand. This was a squash and was absolute garbage. Just a way to say Vince is standing behind his man.

NO RATING.

Kofi Kingston (c) def. Kevin Owens – WWE WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPIONSHIP

What a 2019 Kofi Kingston has had! KO’s return has been great, too. I enjoyed KO’s heel turn despite it being way too soon, in my opinion. 

This match had a lot to follow with the Universal Championship match burning the house down. Still, really good stuff from these two. There was a weird spot where Owens took off Kofi’s shoes. What was that about? Owens senton from the top looked great, but Kofi put his knees up, hit the Trouble in Paradise and scored the 1, 2, 3 for the win.

KOFIMANIA RAGES ON!

4 Stars

Men’s Money in the Bank Ladder Match

Why is Corbin still wearing the vest? Other contestants in this match are Ricochet, Finn Balor, Andrade “Cien” Almas, Drew McIntyre, Mustafa Ali, Randy Orton, and…. ? 

Orton just sat around and backdropped everyone on the announcer’s desk and then disappeared for 19 minutes. It was clear that Ricochet, Balor and Ali were only put into this match to take highlight reel level bumps. There was a nasty spot where Andrade powerbombed Finn off the top of the ladder onto another ladder that was set up as a bridge! Really nasty stuff.

Ali hit a Spanish Fly on Andrade off the ladder. Corbin choke slammed Ali through the Spanish announce table. It was brutal. Ali’s selling was amazing! Finn’s poor back. He took the most back bumps on ladders.

Ali was at the top of the ladder, briefcase in hand, and then Brock’s music hit. He ran down, knocked ladders into a few cameramen, took out Ali and grabbed the briefcase.

The very worst thing of WWE during the past few years has returned. Money in the Bank has been made irrelevant yet again for another year.

Fun match. Great bumps. Bullshit finish.

WHAT ARE THE RULES?!

3 1/2 Stars